No guy tells the truth about what he doesn't like about you. Even worse, they don't ever give you anything real to work on so that your a better wife or girlfriend. And OMG, meeting decent guys is a whole other story. The other funny thing is that girls tend to pick the brains of their friends or other guy friends to figure out WTF to do. I will tell you that this is almost exactly the opposite of what you should actually do. Nobody will give it to you as straight as I'm about to, with as much experience as I have.
In this quick guide I'm going to no bullshit, go over everything you need to know to be an amazing girlfriend, lover, wife, etc. I'm going to give it to you straight up and you can do what you want with it. This stuff isn't something you could find scanning through Cosmo magazine. It isn't going to be "Top 10 sex things" and then you get a bunch of crap like that you'll never use. I'm going to teach you step by step how to not only do everything you need to be fucking amazing in all aspects of the dating world. But I'm also going to tell you how to do it all without it being: 1 ridiculously embarrassing when you try it 2 not knowing how he will react 3 how to tell if he actually likes my suggestions before using them.
A little about myself... I've been teaching seduction and giving dating advice for over 6 years professionally. I've travelled all over teaching and learning from the best of the best. I've spent thousands of hours learning and practicing the art of being the best dating and pick up trainer in the world. Think of me as the real world version of Will Smith in the movie "Hitch". But this is the first time I will be giving out "for FREE", my guides for women.
WARNING: We are going to start with your inner self and then go into examples of how to be sexy physically and things to do that really drive guys crazy, along with examples of things you can actually do to keep your boyfriend or husband unbelievably happy, without too much work... keeping a guy around actually has a ton to do with your personality, so I would strongly recommend not skipping ahead. To skip the basics and inner self exercises click here:
Skip to SEX and Seduction
So first thing's first. You need a to be able to find guys or already be with a guy in order to use any of the material or dating advice in this program. Here are the top places to meet guys without trying too hard:
1.) Gym: Kickboxing classes, Yoga, etc (Plus you'll be getting in shape at the same time.)
2.) The Mall
4.) Clubs & bars
5.) Running errands/ grocery store
6.) Around college campus areas & school
7.) Concerts & sports events
8.) Tourist attractions
9.) Amusement parks
10.) Coffee shops & bookstores
The above examples are bound to have guys flocking them. It really depends on your age, intentions, and how far out of your normal routine your willing to go to meet men.
For instance a bookstore is probably a terrible place to meet guys if you want a party boy that is looking for an immediate hookup. On the other hand it is a great place to meet intelligent, handsome, bring home to dad kind of men.
It's so funny when you start giving a student material and dating advice to try... they go out and try it and then say "Hey it didn't work, I probly just said your line wrong" when in fact the problem is they look like a bum asking for money on the side of the road, their hair is a mess, they're still wearing t-shirts designed by Posh Spice, and they smell like a dead whale on the beach.
One of the biggest complaints I get from men is that their girls don't even try to dress up. Girls always say "Guys just want you to look slutty and wear short club dresses all the time."... this isn't actually true. Guys want to showoff their girl... but you don't need to be slutty. You just need to be feminine. There's a big difference between being slutty or being seductive and feminine. Tight clothing is definitely a plus but it's about showing off your curves, showing off your cleavage a little, etc. Wear tops with low cut backs or some jeans with wedges, a white tank top to show off your girls, and a sexy jean jacket to go over. That has polled more attractive than short dresses in many cases.
Another way to stand out: dressing up or down based on occasion. If you show up at a house party and you have a dress on and everyone else is wearing a t-shirt... or If your at a black tie dinner and your wearing a tank top, then your going to stand out. You can even make opening lines out of your situation "I guess I didn't get the memo."
We talked about what you look like personally. Now we're going to go over social value and thin-slicing basics. Thin-slicing is a term recently popularized in M. Gladwells book called Blink: The Power of Thinking without Thinking.
In the book thin-slicing is defined as our ability to gauge what IS from a very short period of experience.
So when somebody thin-slices you, their basically judging you on what you look like, where you are, who your with, and the potential for you to be the object of which they date or hook-up with. These are all very important things to be aware of at all times.
For instance you can usually tell a guy is in a fraternity by his pink polo shirt, sweater vest, hairstyle, tassle shoes, while still having the ability to smell like last nights empty keg in the garage. You can usually tell how classy somebody is, how slutty, how rich or poor, within the first couple of seconds. Atleast that is what thin-slicing defines and it's what guys will go off of.
The type of people your surrounded by has a profound impact on your thin-slice. If you show up looking good, feeling good, and on your a game... but you show up at a bar with no fun friends and bitchy work friends, you'll have a hard time getting hit on. In all situations try to picture what you look like from everyone else's perspective.
It's unfortunate to think that most people choose whether to reject you or not based on the current experience they see you in. But it also doesn't fail too often which is why guys do it. You do it as well... so now it's just time to be aware and manipulate what you look like off the bat to be as attracting as possible.
1.) Show up to social events as often as possible.
2.) Smile when you walk into the room
Mission: Everytime you walk into a room focus on smiling. You might think you look stupid. But it comes off as a girl that is enjoying life. Go for the coy, if only you knew how fun my life is "smile".
3.) Dress to suit your audience. You want to think "do I look like my desired mans dream girl right now. Is my style matching that? Hot rocker chick = Edgy rocker guy. Sorority girl = Frat guy, etc.
4.) The people around you should reflect your lifestyle. If the guys/girls in your group are all aspiring, driven, confident, good looking people that are good socially... Your in the money zone! If not consider hanging out with new people. Join a meetup.com group that allows you to get out and meet new different guys and girls.
This stuff all addresses how valuable a catch you are. Over the course of this program we will teach you how to become high value, so that you can look in the mirror and say "I'm the perfect catch for my ideal man."
Social circle game is extremely powerful and we will be talking in a more advanced stage later. Particularly on how to get that first group of high status people to use as your value booster into the high status circles of men.
In the long term we want to focus on being competent in seduction but focus on self improvement and identity as your short-term goal. Strengthening your confidence and developing an un-shakable sense of identity is key. This will change the dynamic from having guys say "Wow she's hot, I want to fuck her." over to "Wow she seems like she has a badass personality and I'd love to go have a conversation with her". This is where real relationships happen. Both your outer self and inner self feed off each other and they should develop simultaneously.
1.) How do you want to be perceived by others?
2.) What type of men do you want in your life... and what's important to you in a man?
You need to develop your identity in a way that better attracts this sort of guy.
3.) Does your style and look reflect the identity you've chosen?
4.) Does your social circle enhance your identity and do your friends respect you?
5.) What accessories could enhance your identity and validate it?... what do I mean by this? See below:
For instance you could have pics on your phone to show guys traits that you want to express.
Example: Family photos to show your close with your family, a picture with your dog, a picture of you with other attractive men somewhere.
Be aware of the man you want to attract! If your showing pictures of you with a bunch of men at a club being crazy party animals, to a guy that is really into nice girls... then your going to lower your value with him and he won't be interested. Instead show a picture with your family or you scuba diving (Cool hobbies).
Your state is your mindset. If you find yourself always doubting things in life... always negative, then you need to fix your thought pattern. Your outward appearance will not be appealing until your internal dialog is enthusiastic, positive, and optimistic. You need to get rid of all the negative and self-defeating thoughts in your mind.
Take thoughts like:
"He probly has a model girlfriend" or "He's probly a jerk" or "He's not looking at me, He's probly into my friends." or "I'm not good looking enough for him and I'm a loser." etc.
Now replace those with thoughts of success. "I am the girl that will make his day today." "He's probly an amazing guy and I'm going to let him talk for a while regardless of the outcome. " "Nothing is more important to this mans busy day than to be swept off his feet by me." etc.
You can get into a good state by blasting your favorite music, calling a funny friend to get you in a good mood, etc.
Your frame is your attitude, beliefs, and body language. You need to convey traits like non-neediness and a willingness to walk away from a guy if he's not the exact one you want. You must not be seeking validation from men or women around you... this lowers your value. Alpha girls that get all the guys do not seek the approval of other people, they just are who they are. This reflects on to him that your not playing around. You know what you want, you know where your going and if he doesn't get his A game on then you might be gone forever and he'll miss out.
If you seem validation-seeking, insecure, attention-seeking, indecisive, try-hard, dependent or unsure it will be a turn off. In short, this is your world and though he is welcomed to enter it, you'll be just fine without him. This is sexy... this is hot... this is attractive. Men are pre-wired to be attracted to "The Girl" a person of abundance instead of a women that will settle for anything which is scarcity (Desperation) aka unattractive.
Have no expectations for an outcome with any particular man. You shouldn't care if he laughs at a joke or doesn't, if he rejects you, if he flirts with you heavily, etc. You can walk away at any moment. In fact walking away when a mans emotions are spiked and he is super attracted to you is called push-pull game. It is meant to send him your frame and show that you don't need him to flirt with you in order to have a good night and that is very attractive. It makes him want to chase YOU.
In any situation whether it be with guys or not. If somebody pings you with something you don't like and you send a reaction. It conveys value to that ping and therefor shows that your weak.
Inner game consists of your confidence, your sense of deservedness or being aware that men want to be with you. As you begin to learn more and more about meeting men you will notice that you spend a lot more time on developing your outer self than your inner self. But when you continue to grow you will begin to realize that nothing compares to a solid frame, a profound comfort in one's own skin, and an un-shackable sense of confidence.
Female to Male attraction is based on four factors:
1.) Offering value
3.) Emotionally un-reactive
4.) Core confidence
*I would also add a fifth factor which is "Sexually non-judgmental/openness to exploring sex" because studies find this is crucial for keeping guys around, but it's not absolutely necessary to spark attraction.
So let's devise a roadmap on how to get there. Inner game is based on:
1.) An underlining positive belief system supporting your goal.
People with strong identities also have a lack of fear. They take risks and venture into the unknown to make there own path instead of following in others footsteps. They are un-aware of societies judgement and or just choose not to acknowledge its relevance.
In our context of risk taking and fearless we are talking about being completely disconnected from our ego, this is different from fearing for your safety.
You can use body language and gestures to open men. Here I will give you a few examples to go by.
Wave towards a group of guys in a crowded area and when they wave back you gesture a "not you, them"... later you can go over and say "that was smooth casanova, don't you hate it when you wave back at somebody that wasn't waving at you? haha".
If you spot a guy eyeing you down from across a club or bar, smile and use your fingers like a piece sign and point at both of your eyes and then back at his... then point at the ground in front of you and do a "come here" gesture. He'll smile but if he doesn't come over then you can walk up to him with a disappointed smile and say "You looked nervous so I thought I'd come put you on the spot. :) ".
A lot of times non-verbal communication works really well because there an easy way to judge if someone likes you. If he's not interested his facial expression will show it. And a lot of times you will do a non-verbal move and forget about it... then later on in the night you'll bump into each other again and it will be much easier to start the conversation without looking like your picking him up.
Teasing is an extremely important part of seduction. It is the reason you don't get stuck in the friend zone most of the time. It is the reason you think guys always end up with bitches instead of you. This is the weapon that they've had since the sandbox days of preschool.
It's important to note that negs are suppose to be playful teases. *NOT MEAN personal jabs.
There suppose to be witty and unexpected, they are meant to throw him off guard and playfully punch you in the arm.
For instance, you can say something like "I wonder why I keep getting hit on by handsome men wearing blue shirts." as soon as a guy wearing a blue shirt approaches the bar where you're seated. The implication that he's about to hit on you is the negative part of that comment, while the "handsome men" line is the compliment.
Here is an example of a switch up. The point is to take something he says that is innocent and turn it against him.